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Tattoo Nightmare!


gougetheeyes
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Had a pretty hilarious "tattoo nightmare" last night. Don't feel obligated to wade through my subconscious insecurities here, but I bet I'm not alone here and I'm sure you tattooers have work nightmares. Anyone wanna share? (C'mon @Perez, you can't tell me those loft murals didn't invade your dreams..)

So here's the dream:

Went to a reputable shop to get two small tattoos and asked for the line drawing because it was my wife's birthday and the tattooer wrote Happy Birthday on it for whatever reason. He said he wasn't sure I would treat it right and I promised I would frame it and give it to her as a birthday gift. One of the tattoos was on my leg so I simply detached my legs from my torso ("I can't believe I never thought of this sooner!") so I could sit and watch without feeling a thing. Everything seemed cool, and then I went to pay and it was super crowded. The counter guy was talking really quietly and I finally got close enough to hear him say, "Ninety fifty." Huh? "Nine thousand fifty dollars." I tried to explain I just got two smallish tattoos, and only brought about a thousand bucks with me, which I figured would be more than enough. He said the tattooer was concerned because I was disrespectful and had some really "questionable work." The other people behind the counter (there were like a dozen and they were all dudes.. true nightmare..) were all just kind of talking and the one dude said, "Listen, they're all arguing about it now and it's gonna be a few weeks before they decide on a price." Right then, I realized I'd scheduled an appointment with a dude doing a guest spot for that day.. though apparently I decided to just get em done earlier? And then the dude came in the door and I decided I needed to get the fuck outta there. So I booked.

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Also, when I was younger, like highschool early 20's I had a recurring nightmare where I somehow thought it was an awesome idea to get a Marilyn Manson full back piece... pretty glad that never came true. I remember even in the dream thinking wow that was a fucking awful idea and being really bummed on the tattoos.

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Also, when I was younger, like highschool early 20's I had a recurring nightmare where I somehow thought it was an awesome idea to get a Marilyn Manson full back piece... pretty glad that never came true. I remember even in the dream thinking wow that was a fucking awful idea and being really bummed on the tattoos.

Being bummed about a Manson tattoo? IS that possible? I mean look at all those bitchin' ICP tattoos!

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Last night I dreamed that I sunburnt my forearm and all the skin fell away in a big hard lump, including my tattoo. I bandaged the hard dead skin to my arm in the hope it would re-attach whilst knowing it was fucked.

I don't know what it means other than perhaps I want to have sex with my Dad or something. Or I am worried about getting sunburn on my tattoo. One of the two.

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Last night I dreamed that I sunburnt my forearm and all the skin fell away in a big hard lump, including my tattoo.

Oh yeah, and when I first started getting tattooed at the ripe old age of 18, I used to always have dreams that they would rub off. The dream would basically be me waking up and seeing them smeared on the sheets or just sliding off my skin. I don't know what that means other than perhaps I want to have sex with Dr Benway's dad..

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Oh yeah, and when I first started getting tattooed at the ripe old age of 18, I used to always have dreams that they would rub off. The dream would basically be me waking up and seeing them smeared on the sheets or just sliding off my skin. I don't know what that means other than perhaps I want to have sex with Dr Benway's dad..

I actually had a dream I acidentally smudged my tattoos, and I was getting yelled at by my tattoo artist. I actually woke up scared and checked on them.

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  • 2 months later...

Last night I had a dream that I was talking with my tattooer about where to place my newest one and he suggested that we reposition the existing tattoos on my leg so we can fit the new one in the perfect spot. It sounded weird to me, but all I could think about were those Cripwell legs. He showed me a few that he did it to on himself and convinced me that it would be fine. So then he poured this liquid over each tattoo and peeled them right off. It was painless and they came off entirely. I couldn't believe it. I asked him how nobody had ever come up with this sooner. What a great invention, I thought to myself. He stuck the tattoos back in their new spots and applied the new one the same way. No machine, just a stencil and that liquid. There were a few parts that weren't adhering entirely and I panicked. He said it'd be cool and to give it time to heal. A few days later in the shower they started washing off. Then I woke up and stared at my legs.

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  • 3 weeks later...

Wow, you fuckers are strange. LOL. j/k. I had one the other night. Long story short, I was tattooing flames on this guy, I got done, went to bandage the tattoo and noticed the flames were real. The fucking guy was on fire and instead of trying to put him out, I screamed and ran, but there was no door to the shop, so the guy just chased me around until I woke up. I actually woke up, and jumped out of bed trying to find the door. Then I started laughing my ass off.

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I had a really weird dream a few weeks ago where my girlfriend had gone on holiday, and when she came back, she was like "Hey, I got you this tattoo as a present" ... And somehow we were able to transplant the tattoo from her to me. I kind of vaguely remember it - I think it was some kind of Thomas Hooper blackwork on my belly. It had that magical realism touch where this surrogate tattoo gift didn't seem strange in the slightest.

A couple of times where I've been tattooed for long sessions and then been back in the following day I've had unsettled sleep with some dreams where I'm being tattooed endlessly or being jabbed with needles (once it was a guy with a syringe doing it, which I guess is my mind coming up with another way to say 'needle').

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And somehow we were able to transplant the tattoo from her to me. I kind of vaguely remember it - I think it was some kind of Thomas Hooper blackwork on my belly. It had that magical realism touch where this surrogate tattoo gift didn't seem strange in the slightest.

That's awesome!

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I had a weird one a few weeks ago where I was applying some lotion, or something like that, to my leg...Then the colour slowly started coming out of my tattoo, but only the shading.

I kept rubbing, and, eventually, I only had the outline left (which, for some reason, was unaffected). I remember thinking "Shit, we have to do all the shading again." I woke up startled.

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  • 3 weeks later...

(For background, my right arm is nearly finished and I have nothing on my left.)

In my dream last night, I was getting a huge tattoo of like a mermaid and some castles, god knows why. Only half-way through getting it done, I noticed that it was being tattooed on the wrong arm, and going over the (awesome) work I already have on my right arm. I told the artist "Oh, can you try to blend it in to what's already there", because I thought too much had been done to try and stop.

I woke up extremely freaked out, thinking all those hours on my arm were wasted T.T

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  • 3 weeks later...
i dreamed that I was going to get a friday the 13th tattoo and the guy doing it was like "hey, get a seahorse, fuck that other shit" I agreed for some reason, but i was legitimately bummed out that i was getting a seahorse on my forearm. Woke up so stoked I didn't have a seahorse.

That counts, right?

IDK...Seahorse?Forearm? Sounds pretty badass to me. lol

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  • 7 months later...

A couple of times where I've been tattooed for long sessions and then been back in the following day I've had unsettled sleep with some dreams where I'm being tattooed endlessly or being jabbed with needles (once it was a guy with a syringe doing it, which I guess is my mind coming up with another way to say 'needle').

I have this dream regularly - a couple times a week at least. That's why I decided to just go ahead and get my legs tattooed. :-)

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I vaguely remember a nightmare after getting my first tattoo 22years ago. It involved me cutting my arm off because I thought it would look cool/tough and all my mates was doing it. Obviously ended up regretting this decision when I realised how it hindered me in life, woke up to see my tattooed arm still there with relief.

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Last night, my wife dreamed that she went to get a small tattoo on her forearm: a bust of Mary in a traditional Americana style. The guy she went to said, "I use laughing gas for all my clients, so you'll be out for the tattoo." He showed her the drawing, and it was all wrong: a photorealistic rendering of Mary. So she told him she didn't want that at all, and he fixed the drawing--a little. Then he gave her the gas, and when she came to, he'd tattooed a shitty dragon that went from her forearm, onto her palm, and then--somehow--onto her forehead! She started freaking out, and even the other guys at his shop said, "Dude, that's not cool. Chicks don't get their palms tattooed."

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Last night, my wife dreamed that she went to get a small tattoo on her forearm: a bust of Mary in a traditional Americana style. The guy she went to said, "I use laughing gas for all my clients, so you'll be out for the tattoo." He showed her the drawing, and it was all wrong: a photorealistic rendering of Mary. So she told him she didn't want that at all, and he fixed the drawing--a little. Then he gave her the gas, and when she came to, he'd tattooed a shitty dragon that went from her forearm, onto her palm, and then--somehow--onto her forehead! She started freaking out, and even the other guys at his shop said, "Dude, that's not cool. Chicks don't get their palms tattooed."

OMG "chicks don't get their palms tattooed" almost made me guffaw at work.

I have all the usual tattoo nightmares like being late for appointments, and I often have ones where the tattoo ends up being much bigger than expected--like I asked for something on my upper arms, and before I realize what's happening, they've tattooed something that goes all the way down to my fingers.

But my best tattoo nightmare came right before I started my backpiece. I had a dream about seeing the design for the first time, and actually, a lot of it was not that far off from what the design ended up being. Except that in between all the normal stuff, right in the very middle of my back, my tattooer put a tribal mask portrait of her face. I was unsure but she totally talked me into how cool it would look. It did not. I was happy to make my tattooer laugh when I recounted this to her at our actual appointment.

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