gougetheeyes

Relationships and tattoos

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Wife was against ink for the longest time. Then I lost a lot of weight, hit the gym and got all metro with dressing better, nice colognes, etc. Then I started showing a strong interest in ink again. Now that I'm all pretty she's really curious as to what kinds of pieces I'm considering. No negativity at all. She's even DVR shows like Inkmaster for me.

I think I broke the code for getting the wife to come around to the idea.

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My husband isn't thrilled when I start talking about a new tattoo, and just politely nods but doesn't say much. Then finally I'll get tired of that game and finally ask "are you going to divorce me if I make an appt?" and of course he'll say no, and then I'll make one. He's not dead set against them, he has a 3/4 sleeve, his ribs done, part of his back, etc. I think it's because I'm the fill in piercer at a shop, so I'm around it often enough and get a hook up price that I've gotten more than he thought I would.

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I'm still hiding mine. I've gotten two new tattoos since last November and my wife doesn't know about them. I get tattooed when she goes on business trips. I keep a t-shirt on all of the time so she doesn't see them. It's pretty immature and selfish of me, but it's who I am. I know I will always love them.

The last time I got one (my third one...I have 5 total...four in the last year) she gave me three days of grief. I want one more large tattoo down my spine. I keep them covered around her and that seems to preserves the peace. I know I'm going to have to face the music someday, and I know I will catch tons of grief, but I want to be able to say that it's been a year since I've gotten my new ink so that I can show her that I'm being responsible about it.

Aside from this, we have a good relationship. And we both realize that tattoos, in the grand scheme of things, are pretty insignificant. But, it sure would have been easier to meet someone that shared my interest in ink. I find women with nice tattoos very sexy.

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I'm still hiding mine. I've gotten two new tattoos since last November and my wife doesn't know about them. I get tattooed when she goes on business trips. I keep a t-shirt on all of the time so she doesn't see them. It's pretty immature and selfish of me, but it's who I am. I know I will always love them.

The last time I got one (my third one...I have 5 total...four in the last year) she gave me three days of grief. I want one more large tattoo down my spine. I keep them covered around her and that seems to preserves the peace. I know I'm going to have to face the music someday, and I know I will catch tons of grief, but I want to be able to say that it's been a year since I've gotten my new ink so that I can show her that I'm being responsible about it.

Aside from this, we have a good relationship. And we both realize that tattoos, in the grand scheme of things, are pretty insignificant. But, it sure would have been easier to meet someone that shared my interest in ink. I find women with nice tattoos very sexy.

Wow... I had a couple that my wife was pissed about and she went months without even acknowledging them. Sometimes I think she has blinders on or maybe tunes them out. I had some sleeve work done earlier in the year, about 2 weeks later we were out for dinner with friends and I had a bit of a sleeve rolled up. Her friend mentions my new work.... my wife asks when did I get that done?

Rob

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How did she react?

My whole thing about hiding them is that I don't want to go through all of the drama associated with getting new ink each time I get a new tattoo. I'd rather get the ink I want and then go through it only once. I'm already saving up for a weekend trip out of state when that happens.

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My wife and I always discuss and agree before spending decent amounts of money, usually anything over a C note. She had been blowing me off on my requests for tattoo money for a long time, a year or two. She thought I was just wanting to get the two really bad tattoos I had covered up and that would be the end of it, and it has been about two years since I had those covered.

Finally we had a long talk about it and I explained that I've been into tattoos since I was a little kid in the 70's looking at the Outlaw Biker magazines in the bookstores. I got some really bad punk rock tats when I was a teenager and, in some amazing moment of clarity, realized just how bad they were. I had no idea how to go about getting good tattoos, every penny I had went to booze and drugs, and I didn't want to end up looking like GG Allin so I stopped with the tattoos.

then I got older, had kids, sobered up, got a good job and took care of my kids and family and now that the kids are mostly grown (19 and 15) I wanna spend some cash and get some really nice tattoos from really good tattooers. And now I know how to find them and, because of this site, I know even more about what makes a good tattoo that will last. this is important as I'm entering my mid 40 and I can already tell that the skin is changing a bit from when I was younger.

After that talk it is all good. Now when we are planning trips or vacations she doesn't get as frustrated when I start mentioning all the awesome tattooers in the area and asking if we can set aside 1K and drop me off for a day while they go do something.

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I'm still hiding mine. I've gotten two new tattoos since last November and my wife doesn't know about them. I get tattooed when she goes on business trips. I keep a t-shirt on all of the time so she doesn't see them.

You wear a T-shirt all the time?!

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You wear a T-shirt all the time?!

Believe it or not, yes. I have a separate bathroom that I use downstairs because I wake up early and don't want to disturb her. I wear a shirt to bed. We have our own routines, but we see plenty of each other throughout the day. My 2 year old digs my sweet and sour baby tattoos and I can't help but wonder if she's the one that's going to out me once she starts talking in complete sentences.

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wow, I cant imagine hiding my tattoos from my wife. I am like a little child with a new toy. I run home and show her first. She is tough to read. She will say oh that's too much, but then we will see someone covered and she will tell me how sexy that is.

I also get her presents as bribery. I got her these Louboutin's she wanted when I made my back appointment. When it turns into a body suit I'm nervous about the present that will require :D

@BrookR70, jesus you make me feel like a nudist. I sleep in boxers only and will relax in like flannel old navy pajama pants. My wife would be concerned if I started wearing clothes more.

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wow, I cant imagine hiding my tattoos from my wife.

I also get her presents as bribery. I got her these Louboutin's she wanted when I made my back appointment. When it turns into a body suit I'm nervous about the present that will require

Hiding new ink from the wife? This will end in pure fail.

I'd engage her instead. I'd show her all the research I'd do in finding the right artist, the design I'm going after etc. In the meantime I'm doing the things that good husbands do to make the boss happy. Cuz if momma's happy then pappy's happy.

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I have 4 tattoos, 5th scheduled for the end of the month. My wife has none, doesn't intend on getting any.

I always discuss with her what I want and where I plan on placing it. She has asked me not to get certain things. Mainly animals that look evil or scary. I can understand that and since we do it with the lights on.....no dragon or snake tattoos for me.

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Hiding new ink from the wife? This will end in pure fail.

I'd engage her instead. I'd show her all the research I'd do in finding the right artist, the design I'm going after etc. In the meantime I'm doing the things that good husbands do to make the boss happy. Cuz if momma's happy then pappy's happy.

I did this with my parrot tattoo. I left the drawings out in plain view, was honest and open with her, showed her the difference between good tattoos and bad tattoos, watched Ink Master with her, took her to a local tattoo convention, and kissed her butt until I got blisters on my lips. She wasn't for it, but she didn't seem completely against it...until after I got it. Then I got the 3rd degree followed by the money lecture (we're fine financially), followed by the silent treatment. She eventually got over it, but at the time I knew I wanted three more tattoos. I'd rather go that whole mess just one more time rather than three times.

Of course, I could have just put a hold on the tattoos after that, but I (probably) made a very stupid choice and went ahead with it anyway.

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Believe it or not, yes. I have a separate bathroom that I use downstairs because I wake up early and don't want to disturb her. I wear a shirt to bed. We have our own routines, but we see plenty of each other throughout the day. My 2 year old digs my sweet and sour baby tattoos and I can't help but wonder if she's the one that's going to out me once she starts talking in complete sentences.

The only time I covered up in front of my wife was during my needle and the spoon days.

She crabs about money though since she isn't into the tattoo thing. Maybe I should of kept track of all the shoes she bought over the years, she'd be ahead by far. What.. another pair of shoes.. how many feet do you have???

I do side work and that's where my free cash comes from. I take nothing out of my main pay check, direct deposit all the way. I spend enough on everything else out of it too.

Rob

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Believe it or not, yes. I have a separate bathroom that I use downstairs because I wake up early and don't want to disturb her. I wear a shirt to bed. We have our own routines, but we see plenty of each other throughout the day. My 2 year old digs my sweet and sour baby tattoos and I can't help but wonder if she's the one that's going to out me once she starts talking in complete sentences.

I'm not sure the underlined "all" necessarily had to do with showering or sleeping...

Okay, in case I'm not being clear, and because I think we are all wondering... do you have sex while wearing a shirt? If not, how does she not notice them? This is just so bizarre to me.

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I did this with my parrot tattoo. I left the drawings out in plain view, was honest and open with her, showed her the difference between good tattoos and bad tattoos, watched Ink Master with her, took her to a local tattoo convention, and kissed her butt until I got blisters on my lips. She wasn't for it, but she didn't seem completely against it...until after I got it. Then I got the 3rd degree followed by the money lecture (we're fine financially), followed by the silent treatment. She eventually got over it, but at the time I knew I wanted three more tattoos. I'd rather go that whole mess just one more time rather than three times.

Of course, I could have just put a hold on the tattoos after that, but I (probably) made a very stupid choice and went ahead with it anyway.

It kind of sounds like a mother-son relationship. I'd try to shift the balance by talking it through (again) and coming clean... Facing the music before she discovers it some other way! I used to hide stuff from my parents if I knew they wouldn't like it but hiding stuff in a marriage is dangerous to the marriage. Causes mistrust, etc. that's supposed to be your partner!

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

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It kind of sounds like a mother-son relationship. I'd try to shift the balance by talking it through (again) and coming clean... Facing the music before she discovers it some other way! I used to hide stuff from my parents if I knew they wouldn't like it but hiding stuff in a marriage is dangerous to the marriage. Causes mistrust, etc. that's supposed to be your partner!

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

I'm no psychiatrist, so maybe you're right, maybe you're not.

Maybe I've decided to fight this battle and let other other battles pass. I keep hearing the word "compromise" being thrown around when describing relationships. Those that have never had to compromise are the lucky ones. I've compromised in so many other ways it's ridiculous. I don't feel that I "deserve" to have tattoos because of my compromises. I feel that it's a harmless way to express myself. My wife sees otherwise.

BTW...I would almost kill to be back in Simi Valley. You should be grateful to be living in such a great place.

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I'm no psychiatrist, so maybe you're right, maybe you're not.

Maybe I've decided to fight this battle and let other other battles pass. I keep hearing the word "compromise" being thrown around when describing relationships. Those that have never had to compromise are the lucky ones. I've compromised in so many other ways it's ridiculous. I don't feel that I "deserve" to have tattoos because of my compromises. I feel that it's a harmless way to express myself. My wife sees otherwise.

Yikes dude.

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I'm no psychiatrist, so maybe you're right, maybe you're not.

Maybe I've decided to fight this battle and let other other battles pass. I keep hearing the word "compromise" being thrown around when describing relationships. Those that have never had to compromise are the lucky ones. I've compromised in so many other ways it's ridiculous. I don't feel that I "deserve" to have tattoos because of my compromises. I feel that it's a harmless way to express myself. My wife sees otherwise.

BTW...I would almost kill to be back in Simi Valley. You should be grateful to be living in such a great place.

Compromises are OK, but not when only one member of the relationship is compromising! Also, tattoos are permanent. They are part of you. I like to say Vermont will always be my home and is a "part" of me, but I've compromised and accepted that it makes more sense for my husband to live closer to NYC. That is the biggest compromise I've made in our relationship, but he knows if he ever takes away a hobby of mine (ex. getting tattooed) were going to have some issues. I would never dream of discouraging him from following something he loves unless it was damaging his health or the relationship. Just my $0.02.

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