Deb Yarian

I was visiting my parents with my new baby. I leaned over the crib and they saw it.
I just remember them shaking their heads.
My dad was from a NY blue collar Irish Catholic family and my mother from an upper middle class Jewish family.
My parents were pretty liberal thinkers but for them a tattoo was more of a class thing.
Even though tattooing eventually became my life it was never anything I shared or share with them.
When my father was hospitalized with a terminal illness I stayed with him and tended to his needs till he died.
I wore long sleeves so that he wouldn't see my tattoos on my arm--- just in case he would make a deathbed request that I not get any more tattoos.
I've come to the realization that my mother's inability to understand,like or appreciate my tattoos is not very different from my inability to accept her dislike.
Recently she also was hospitalized and I told her not to worry that I would get on a plane and be by her side In the morning ( even though my untattooed brother lives within an hour of her) What did she say? "Cover your tattoos!"
I've come to realize that many people when looking at tattoos can not see content, skill,quality.
When I first started getting tattooed my mother said to me that she didn't wnt my life made harder because of my tattoos and people judging because of them and I said that if people were going to judge me by the way I look they are not the people I want to be friends with anyway.
My mother's attitude has really helped me in my own relationship with my children. how to be more accepting of their appearances.

I was tattooing at a busy shop outside of Ft Benning Ga.
Don was stationed there working as a Ranger instructor. He got tattooed at the shop and soon became my client.within a few months he began working there also learning how to tattoo and working the 10-3am shift. We were friends , he had a girlfriend and I was married to another tattooer at the shop and had a little boy.
Don became a close family friend, a trusted coworker and I know that we really bonded during the hours spent tattooing him.
I guess we were friends and coworkers for about 2 years or so when I became single again.
I can't say that we had a wild romance but just that we were such good friends and we really liked and respected one another.
Our first date , so to speak, was in June - and we were married at the end of November.
For the next 10 years we tattooed wherever Don was stationed ( he worked in the army and tattooed till he retired from the military, almost 10 years ago) We also went on to have 5 more children.
this November we'll be married 20 years.

And customers often make the assumption that the person booked out the furthest is the best!
I used to work in a shop with 6 other tattooists. We were booked according to seniority at the shop. So, inevitably some were booked out further than others.
A customer would come in only to be told that Joe is booked out for 6 months and Jim for 3 months and 2 months out for Jay and John but You can get in with Deb TOMORROW! Customers assumed then that if you weren't booked you weren't worth waiting for, usually not taking in to account that Jay only booked 1 appt a day or Jim only worked every other week.
People are weird, they like the hard to get, the over priced .

And as a client I like to think that my tattooer is so committed to my project that they carry it around in a special brief case hand cuffed to their wrist till my tattoo appt------ but as a tattooer I find it interesting that clients assume that as soon as they make their appointment- i'll be working on their tattoo non stop - till they're in my chair-
This isn't directed at anyone who posted--- just a side note.

In defense of your tattooer I have done the same, many times.
I take notes during my consultation with my customer--- but because I find that the closer to the appt time we get the more likely the client is to change their design. I do my final drawing just a day or so before the appt.
At the start of each week though I start calling clients in my appt book to confirm their appt and a lot of times what they're getting isn't indicated in my appt book. So I might ask what they're getting or need a reminder

Benadryl or some other over the counter med might help if you're going crazy.
My new tattoo was very itchy and it's been 2 weeks.
Definitely worse at night, when I am tired.

And customers often make the assumption that the person booked out the furthest is the best!
I used to work in a shop with 6 other tattooists. We were booked according to seniority at the shop. So, inevitably some were booked out further than others.
A customer would come in only to be told that Joe is booked out for 6 months and Jim for 3 months and 2 months out for Jay and John but You can get in with Deb TOMORROW! Customers assumed then that if you weren't booked you weren't worth waiting for, usually not taking in to account that Jay only booked 1 appt a day or Jim only worked every other week.
People are weird, they like the hard to get, the over priced .

I was once 360 pounds. I can write a book about every type of scenario and the painful feelings you can imagine with regards to an overweight person. It has happened to me. Even at 230, I still have a good amount of those feelings no matter what people tell me.
Anyways, tattoos are cool to look at on anyone. :cool:

Quick Tumblr search:

Junii Salmon
Jill Bonny
Katja Ramirez

Greg Irons

Thanks! A faked line is laid out so that it will pay out without coiling or twisting.
The one I'd like is like this:

Last week, Sarah Hurst of Vivid Tattoo, Knoxville, TN put a nice likeness of my submarine dolphins and SSBN patrol pin on my chest. My first ink at 61. I had seen a sailor getting a tattoo removed the old way - rock salt abrasion - back in the 70's when I was in, and that really scared me off (don't know what he had, but there was an old chief standing over him basically letting him now that if he cried out, he'd give him something to yelp about.
Now, my grandfather served in both world wars. Lied about his age to get in WW1, and that I'm sure is when he got his tattoos. I only remember a couple of them - a cupie doll and a faked line. Someday I might get that faked line on my forearm. Maybe.
I'm very pleased with my new ink. Not showy or perfect (the patrol pin has some wiggles and a run-away line, and the stars could be sharper). But, at only 4" (~10cm) wide, it has great detail - and the drop shadow was a neat surprise!
These represent 10 patrols on USS Von Steuben SSBN632. A total underwater time of 2.5 years. Although my Lord and my family mean more to me, I don't have a design in mind that would represent the marks they have left on me. I guess that remains for me to represent.

This may or may not prove useful / interesting, and it may or may not be too much information to share on the Internet, but below is an exact word-for-word copy and pasted conversation I had with my dad a few years ago about my tattoos. Needless to say, this is the last time tattoos have ever been an issue between us, and I'm happy to say that both my dad and stepmom are cool as hell about my tattoos now (even after seeing me with my hands and fingers covered in tattoos for the first time when I went back to visit them a few months ago).
This whole ordeal started when I got a text message out-of-the-blue from my stepmom that said this:
"I thought I would pass on to you my critique of tattoo art. It is one dimensional art done by mediocre art class dropouts whose work, if not embedded in skin, would eventually be sold at a garage sale for a dollar to some lady in pink shorts."
Needless to say, I was pretty frustrated / upset, and ignored the message entirely and sent no response.
A week later, I got this message from my dad:
"Just read what Kel sent to you on the "tattoo" ... Unless its a picture of Libby [their dog], I agree"
After becoming even more upset, and after stewing over these messages for about a week, I finally responded to my dad, and the following conversation took place...
Me: "I want you to know that I'm pretty unimpressed with the messages you and Kelly sent me last week."
Dad: "We didn't think that you would jump for joy. Just an exercise of concern on that line of expression and the view of 56 (28x2) years of experience... Didn't expect you to necessarily agree, but wanted you to know we are concerned about you... Its of course your choice, but we are allowed to voice concern... I think we are anyway, love does that kind of thing..."
Me: "That's fine, but I want you to know how I feel about your approach. First of all, I don't appreciate the unprovoked, passive aggressive attack in the slightest. Secondly, I don't expect you to like tattoos or understand them but I do expect you to have some respect for me. If you take offence to a decision I've made, or something I've done, or an entire industry for that matter, I expect you to be adult about it and have a discussion as opposed to making misinformed, uneducated and insulting jabs about a topic you clearly no nothing about. That being said, you're entitled to your opinion and I respect that. I don't expect you to like it, but I do expect you to be a little more tactful and treat me like an adult if you have an issue. I love you guys and it really hurt me to be treated that way."
Dad: "Sorry Mike, you know we had no intention in hurting you and respect is certainly not an issue as we respect you implicitly. Yes, we know that Tat's are a form of expression. We just want to make sure that as you add them that it is something you really want as we know so many people who a few years later are sorry they didn't think the choice through a little further..."
Me: "I appreciate your concern, and I take no issue with you guys feeling that way. Like I said, the issue I had was with the way you guys chose to say it. The nature of our relationship seems to be that we don't speak very often (which is too bad, but for whatever reason that's how it's gone) so I cherish the times where we do talk so much. It hurt me that your comments came so out of the blue and seemed to take the place of us being able to catch up as people because everyone was so caught up in outward appearances. What I'm trying to say is that I love and miss you guys, and I was upset all week about the way that that situation went down."
Firstly, I consider myself very lucky that he was so open to my point-of-view and was willing to discuss it, but I firmly believe that open and honest communication is the key to remedying these particular kinds of situations.
Either way, good luck @keepcalm!

This is a wonderful thread filled with great quotes and lots of things I can relate to.
This is great advice. It's easy for us tattoo-lovin' freaks to sit here and think, "Who wouldn't love my tattoo? It's beautiful!" But what helps me is to try to understand someone else's perspective. Personally, I find scarification hideous. (No offense to anyone here who might be into that.) If my daughter, who is now 5, grew up to get good tattoos, I'd be happy. But if she went out and got huge scars, I'd be heartbroken. Does that make me a hypocrite? You're damned right, it does. It's no different from tattoos in that it's a form of personal expression wherein the canvas is one's body. So if I think of it that way, I can relate to your parents.
Which brings me to another great quote from this thread:
Or to my own parents, who--believe it or not--don't know that I'm tattooed. Let's just say that we're not very close. So I hope you can find some solace in the fact that your parents seem very awesome in comparison to mine, who are very judgmental (and old and uber Catholic and lifelong residents of a small town).
In a thread filled with great quotes and stories, my favorite is from Deb:
I spent many years vying for my parents' approval. I have it in certain areas--I'm married to a great woman, am raising a good kid, and I am successful in my professional life--but I'll never have it in others. And I'm cool with that. Einstein (allegedly) defined insanity as "doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results." It took years, but I finally stopped expecting my parents to accept certain things. And I'm happier as a result.
Good luck to you.

I only recently figured out that waiting for my mom's approval or appreciation of my tattoos is fruitless. I've been waiting for over thirty years & it's not ever going to happen.
My mother hates my tattoos, she thinks tattoos are ugly and thinks that they look dirty!!! I realize that when she sees any tattoo- it's as if a veil comes down and she doesn't see content. All tattoos are the same to her.
Well you know what was very freeing??? It was my realization that my expecting my mom to accept my tattoos is as unreasonable as her expectation that I would not like them or want to get them. It's her opinion and she is entitled to it.
I also have an otherwise close relationship with my mom. Another thing that has changed is that at one time in my life I would dress to cover my tattoos while visiting my mom- now I do not.
- - - Updated - - -
Keep in mind that up until only recently - the last 10 years or so- tattoos for the most part were only popular with certain subcultures of the population- especially getting heavily tattooed. Bikers, people in jail, the military and sideshow freaks. No others !

I only recently figured out that waiting for my mom's approval or appreciation of my tattoos is fruitless. I've been waiting for over thirty years & it's not ever going to happen.
My mother hates my tattoos, she thinks tattoos are ugly and thinks that they look dirty!!! I realize that when she sees any tattoo- it's as if a veil comes down and she doesn't see content. All tattoos are the same to her.
Well you know what was very freeing??? It was my realization that my expecting my mom to accept my tattoos is as unreasonable as her expectation that I would not like them or want to get them. It's her opinion and she is entitled to it.
I also have an otherwise close relationship with my mom. Another thing that has changed is that at one time in my life I would dress to cover my tattoos while visiting my mom- now I do not.
- - - Updated - - -
Keep in mind that up until only recently - the last 10 years or so- tattoos for the most part were only popular with certain subcultures of the population- especially getting heavily tattooed. Bikers, people in jail, the military and sideshow freaks. No others !

And I tattoo many older people, who keep the fact that they get tattooed hidden from their older parents.

I only recently figured out that waiting for my mom's approval or appreciation of my tattoos is fruitless. I've been waiting for over thirty years & it's not ever going to happen.
My mother hates my tattoos, she thinks tattoos are ugly and thinks that they look dirty!!! I realize that when she sees any tattoo- it's as if a veil comes down and she doesn't see content. All tattoos are the same to her.
Well you know what was very freeing??? It was my realization that my expecting my mom to accept my tattoos is as unreasonable as her expectation that I would not like them or want to get them. It's her opinion and she is entitled to it.
I also have an otherwise close relationship with my mom. Another thing that has changed is that at one time in my life I would dress to cover my tattoos while visiting my mom- now I do not.
- - - Updated - - -
Keep in mind that up until only recently - the last 10 years or so- tattoos for the most part were only popular with certain subcultures of the population- especially getting heavily tattooed. Bikers, people in jail, the military and sideshow freaks. No others !

I only recently figured out that waiting for my mom's approval or appreciation of my tattoos is fruitless. I've been waiting for over thirty years & it's not ever going to happen.
My mother hates my tattoos, she thinks tattoos are ugly and thinks that they look dirty!!! I realize that when she sees any tattoo- it's as if a veil comes down and she doesn't see content. All tattoos are the same to her.
Well you know what was very freeing??? It was my realization that my expecting my mom to accept my tattoos is as unreasonable as her expectation that I would not like them or want to get them. It's her opinion and she is entitled to it.
I also have an otherwise close relationship with my mom. Another thing that has changed is that at one time in my life I would dress to cover my tattoos while visiting my mom- now I do not.
- - - Updated - - -
Keep in mind that up until only recently - the last 10 years or so- tattoos for the most part were only popular with certain subcultures of the population- especially getting heavily tattooed. Bikers, people in jail, the military and sideshow freaks. No others !

I only recently figured out that waiting for my mom's approval or appreciation of my tattoos is fruitless. I've been waiting for over thirty years & it's not ever going to happen.
My mother hates my tattoos, she thinks tattoos are ugly and thinks that they look dirty!!! I realize that when she sees any tattoo- it's as if a veil comes down and she doesn't see content. All tattoos are the same to her.
Well you know what was very freeing??? It was my realization that my expecting my mom to accept my tattoos is as unreasonable as her expectation that I would not like them or want to get them. It's her opinion and she is entitled to it.
I also have an otherwise close relationship with my mom. Another thing that has changed is that at one time in my life I would dress to cover my tattoos while visiting my mom- now I do not.
- - - Updated - - -
Keep in mind that up until only recently - the last 10 years or so- tattoos for the most part were only popular with certain subcultures of the population- especially getting heavily tattooed. Bikers, people in jail, the military and sideshow freaks. No others !

I only recently figured out that waiting for my mom's approval or appreciation of my tattoos is fruitless. I've been waiting for over thirty years & it's not ever going to happen.
My mother hates my tattoos, she thinks tattoos are ugly and thinks that they look dirty!!! I realize that when she sees any tattoo- it's as if a veil comes down and she doesn't see content. All tattoos are the same to her.
Well you know what was very freeing??? It was my realization that my expecting my mom to accept my tattoos is as unreasonable as her expectation that I would not like them or want to get them. It's her opinion and she is entitled to it.
I also have an otherwise close relationship with my mom. Another thing that has changed is that at one time in my life I would dress to cover my tattoos while visiting my mom- now I do not.
- - - Updated - - -
Keep in mind that up until only recently - the last 10 years or so- tattoos for the most part were only popular with certain subcultures of the population- especially getting heavily tattooed. Bikers, people in jail, the military and sideshow freaks. No others !

20 Great Female Tattoo Artists in History Tattooing Over 20 Years | TAM Blog

I only recently figured out that waiting for my mom's approval or appreciation of my tattoos is fruitless. I've been waiting for over thirty years & it's not ever going to happen.
My mother hates my tattoos, she thinks tattoos are ugly and thinks that they look dirty!!! I realize that when she sees any tattoo- it's as if a veil comes down and she doesn't see content. All tattoos are the same to her.
Well you know what was very freeing??? It was my realization that my expecting my mom to accept my tattoos is as unreasonable as her expectation that I would not like them or want to get them. It's her opinion and she is entitled to it.
I also have an otherwise close relationship with my mom. Another thing that has changed is that at one time in my life I would dress to cover my tattoos while visiting my mom- now I do not.
- - - Updated - - -
Keep in mind that up until only recently - the last 10 years or so- tattoos for the most part were only popular with certain subcultures of the population- especially getting heavily tattooed. Bikers, people in jail, the military and sideshow freaks. No others !

And I tattoo many older people, who keep the fact that they get tattooed hidden from their older parents.